Conditioning and Training Works
There is a corny (obvious or sentimental and not at all original) metaphor (an expression, often found in literature, that describes a person or object by referring to something that is considered to have similar characteristics to that person or object), but it's true.
I remember, one time, I was with my family at the circus. There was a person there, and they had this big, giant elephant. You look at this elephant. They take this (elephant) little rope, put it around the elephant's neck, and they drive this stake into the ground. I mean, you look at this, and you know that elephant could rip down the entire tent with almost no effort. Yet, the elephant doesn't struggle, doesn't try. Why? Because the elephant is conditioned.
They could take that elephant and condition the elephant when it's a baby elephant. That's how they train them. When it's a little baby elephant and it doesn't have the power, yet, they put a big rope around it, and they drive this huge stake in the ground. The elephant fights and fights and fights. One day, finally, that elephant decides, "I'm not capable of pulling this out." Once that becomes the definition of an identity of anyone - an elephant, in this case - they don't even try, anymore. "It's just who I am. That's how it is. That's just the way it is in my life."
I'd like to ask you to take a look at any place you've got a limitation and ask yourself, "When did I decide to accept that limitation?" You may not even see it as a limitation. You might see it as, just, "That's who I am."
Human sets Limitation on the Basis of Fear and Greed
So often, in our lives, we've adapted to be a certain way, so that we don't fail or so that people will like us or respect us. It's not necessarily who we are. 
Joy comes when you're spontaneous. It's really hard to be truly happy when you're not being yourself, and most of us have no clue who we are. A big part of my work is to get people to do things spontaneously, without thinking, because that's when the real you shows up. That's when the energy comes alive. When you do that, when you start to connect your true nature, suddenly, there's energy available for you to set a higher standard for what you want in your life. That's what this is really all about.
‘Shoulds’ and ‘Musts’ Set ‘Standards of Life’
When I talk about "standards" or I talk about "shoulds" versus "musts," think about your own life. I know there have been areas in your life where, at some point in time, you just shifted. You raised the standard, and your life changed because whatever people have their identity attached to, they live.
We live who we believe we are. That's just how it works.
http://www.yousubtitles.com/Tony-Robbinss-Top-10-Rules-For-Success-TonyRobbins-id-880813
Aayen-e-Nau Se Darna, Tarz-e-Kuhan Pe Urna
Manzil Yehi Kathan Hai Qoumon Ki Zindagi Mein
To be afraid of the new ways, to insist on the old ones
This is the only difficult stage in the life of nations



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